To say goodbye.

No, not to Theosophy, not by any means. But to the Adyar Society and probably to all organized Theosophy as well.

Over a year ago I saw a face of the society that I hoped that I would never see. And having seen it resolved to give myself another year to see if things would improve. They have not. All I see is infighting and nonsense about elections and finances and now the damned beach at Adyar. It fills me with horror.

When I was living down near Chicago, I spent a lot of time at Olcott. I knew the staff and the officers of the Society. They were my friends, for the most part. I had some of the happiest days of my life there. And, some of the most poignant, like the day that Dora Kunz tried to console me after the death of my grandmother. Theosophists do not handle death well, we dont' quite know how to approach it. I mention my grandmother because when she learned that I had joined the TS, she was overjoyed. I never quite knew why.

But life changes. Life goes on. Life ends and now the only thing that I see in the Quest is the roll of the dead, as friend after friend from those days goes on to whatever awaits us all. I grow tired of mourning. I grow tired of nostalgia for a time in my life that is gone and will never come again.

But knowing those people caused me to make excuses for their bad behaviour at times, to justify things that I should not have. Good people have been hurt, good people have been driven away. And now it is time for me to leave as well. I have decided not to renew my membership after 30 plus years. It is hard to believe that I am leaving behind something that has been a part of me most of my adult life. But the sad truth is that the dream I had when I joined is long dead. And when a dream dies, there is nothing to be done but to get a new one.

People have wondered at my silence these last months. I had nothing to say. There was nothing to talk about. I had to take time, to be sure of my decision. And having made it, having crossed that Rubicon, I look back in sadness at what is lost, and what might have been. And then I will look back no more. I doubt that I will be missed much. I was more of a burden than a blessing, the ne'er-do-well nephew that the family rather wished would go off to the colonies or something. Perhaps they will breathe a sigh of relief at my departure, taking my heresies with me.

No doubt many will.

But make no mistake. I am still a Theosophist, albeit an extemely heretical one.

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Comment by Charles Cosimano on October 4, 2010 at 3:42pm
Don't worry, I'm not leaving here. I just had to take a sabbatical from flapping my jaws so much that brain no longer knew what my mouth was saying.
Comment by Ferran Sanz Orriols on October 4, 2010 at 8:39am
... continuation from previous post...
... just like every disciple tends to think that the Master in some miraculous way will amend the disciples' mistakes... but it is the disciple who is to learn how miracles are made!!!!! and that cannot be unless I learn from my mistakes.
From my own experience on mistakes, I can say that the Master can (within the Law, of course) help the disciple not to die before learning, and that is something.
So I don't think that TS will die. If TS dirigents are eager to learn from their mistakes, TS will heal; and it's the same in any other organization in any of the human fields of effort. Why should any one be "special"?
I am really happy to be in this website and I'd like to know which are your heresies ( I bet that mine are larger ;-)
Comment by Ferran Sanz Orriols on October 4, 2010 at 7:10am
Dear Charles (yes, you've become a dear one just by lettin' me read what is inside you), dear friends all.
I'm quite new here and I hope that this one above is not the last post I read from you.
I've never been a member of TS ( I don't even know which are exactly its branches) and I don't care about its politics and organisation... by the way, I'm not sure if this website is "organized Theosophy" ;-) ... so I don't care at all about your "membership".
When the word "heretical" is used we seem to be within an ecclesial use of language... my dear friends, TS society faces the same problems than Arcane School, Agni Yoga society, SHARE international... the same problems that emerged when the Prophet Muhammad died, when the Christ was "ascended", when Buddha entered Nirvana, etc... disciples, disciples who only understand a part of the received Teaching.
The dirigents of any Hierarchycally founded organization seem to believe that this kind of Foundation will make them and/or their organization immune to mistakes... I'm really sorry but I must stop writing now ... it'll be continued.
Everyone have a nice day!!!

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