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ModeratorPermalink Reply by Deb on December 31, 2012 at 1:56pm

Wow, Jessica!  Good question.   I hope we get some good responses because I could use some good ideas!  LOL  

I think you're so right about the negative self-talk.  I know I do it, and when I catch myself doing it, I stop and have a little correction moment with that little negative mini-me.  I have tried affirmations and all that, but to me, they all sound stupid and false when I'm saying them.  I just end up feeling ridiculous, even though I know the concept that the subconscious simply believes whatever it is told, regardless of whether the conscious mind does or not.  That may be true, but the whole thing still feels very silly. 

What works better for me is to think about why I am thinking a particular thing.  That and learning to recognize people and relationships that are bad for me and culling them from my life where I can.  It's harder when that's not immediately possible, so one has to use the mind in a positive way, rather than letting it run willy-nilly. 

For me, usually it comes around to being fearful &/or reactionary, that is, reacting to others' comments or actions - my perceptions of them, which may or may not be correct!    I think the first key is just simply recognize when we are indulging in this negative self-talk, and to see it for what it is.  Not Truth-Written-In-Stone, but the product of fears and anxieties working on our thoughts.  In this case, our minds are not our friend.

What complicates it for me is that I often pick-up on emotional currents that others are feeling, and sometimes it's hard to know whether those currents have anything to do with myself or if I am, in a way, emotionally eaves-dropping.  I don't do it on purpose, it just happens, and I am learning that likely it's not ALL ABOUT ME!  LOL   But for people who are naturally empathic or psychic - whatever, it's essential that they learn to recognize and navigate the barrage of feelings they encounter. 

Permalink Reply by PuzzleSolver on April 11, 2013 at 9:30am

I have to agree with Deb, this is an excellent question! I think if we had the answer to this we would all be Happy go lucky people with motivation and all that great stuff! But I think the negativity is there for a reason, and I don't know why. I can only ask why it's there. Maybe it stems back from knowing that we are greater than what we give ourselves credit for?

Maybe it's a way for our mind to tell us that we can do better? I know that we are built for survival and our emotions and thoughts are put there just for that. How else would someone know how to run away from a prowling lion. It's in our nature. I guess we should look into WHY those negative thoughts come into our heads.

As for my daily ritual I try to take a lot of things in action rather just in thought. In other words instead of just thinking positively I push myself to do positive things.

This is how I start, I will sit down after I wake up and wash up and spend 5-15 minutes with myself in meditation/prayer then I put on some motivational speeches or motivational music while I stretch or sit and think with a cup of coffee. The next step I have found one of the most influential parts of me staying positive.... I think: What will make this a good day? What would make this the best morning? and I WRITE IT DOWN. That way it's not just something that I said to myself like "I have wonderful mornings and I'm super positive" which I'll probably forget within 5 minutes of saying it. This way I have an actual piece of paper that says "If I were to have a great day I would do: _______" fill in the blank. Then I take it along with me throughout the day taking an occasional glance at it. For some reason this is a hard habit for me to do every single day, but I can tell you that it works :) Oh guess what, it's morning time here! I guess I'll put this on my list haha