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Permalink Reply by Brenda Tucker on May 20, 2009 at 12:37pm

I like how you put it and believe me I can use all the help I can get putting it in different lights.

People in general think they are going to enjoy immensely being explorers and making discovery. We learn that very early in life - to regard discovery as paramount not just to our survival, but also to our sense of justice. Every day when we learn, we feel as if we are explorers and even though it has been learned by someone else, it is new to us and a very satisfying accomplishment to acquire knowledge.

I need you, Bill Meredith, because I have so few sounding boards. My discovery was supposed to make me rich (as if when learning), but it made me impoverished for want of the ideas of others on this same subject.

I think one of the motivations that sparked this idea (not heard about but produced by logical analysis of what I read) was the "forced alone-ness" that comes when we study theosophy. For example, the fourth initiation, often referred to in regards to Jesus Christ alone on the cross. Or the idea of liberation resulting in "isolated unity" in The Yoga Sutras. Doing without sex can make a person crave something. I wonder if a commitment to that (as well as study and purification) induced the readiness in my mind to invite the thought that another living thing or kingdom could combine with me?

Do you know how I can best balance my nature when I have to deal with my life in so many different "imagined" situations? When I was a member of a group, I craved that they might come forward to offer me their arm, to promote my new knowledge, to partner with me in spreading this information. When the group continued as always along their path of chosen endeavor, I cringed and mutilated myself for belonging to them. I am always seeking greater exposure. I am hoping that Christianity will find me a valuable member and use their network of communication to consider what I have learned. I also hope that our American government will find it possible to include my work in their classrooms and school system, even newspapers, but I am still sometimes so alone and so I just offer myself to the greater girasas kingdom for their use (in some small way most likely). I guess if we have peace and prosperity that is enough.

Brenda

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Permalink Reply by Bill Meredith on May 21, 2009 at 3:06pm

Brenda, you are very thoughtful.

I am moved by your expression of the "forced alone-ness." Perhaps I feel it, too, although I might prefer to characterize it as solitude more than alone-ness. Maybe we are all sounding boards for each other and just not hearing all the echos.

The great poet, Rainer Maria Rilke said, "A merging of two people is an impossibility, and where it seems to exist, it is a hemming-in, a mutual consent that robs one party or both parties of their fullest freedom and development. But once the realization is accepted that even between the closest people infinite distances exist, a marvelous living side-by-side can grow up for them, if they succeed in loving the expanse between them, which gives them the possibility of always seeing each other as a whole and before an immense sky." Rilke is considered one of the German language's greatest 20th century poets. His haunting images focus on the difficulty of communion with the ineffable in this age of disbelief, solitude, and profound anxiety . While Ranier's comments above were addressing the joining of two people in marriage, I think they are applicable to all relationships including the desire to be combined with another living thing or kingdom (god or girasas).

As to how one can best balance one's nature, it would seem important to understand what it is that one is trying to balance. I have recently added something to my blog "Theosophical Wandering" that helps me with my own understanding. Maybe it will help you, too. http://theosnet.ning.com/profiles/blog/show?id=3055387%3ABlogPost%3...

I understand your disillusionment with the various groups you have joined. For similar reasons, I tend not to belong to any groups. And yet I belong to them all.

Peace and prosperity,

Bill

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Permalink Reply by Brenda Tucker on May 20, 2009 at 12:40pm

It seems a bit of a cop out, Alex, when ideas concerning a 6th race are discovered to run and hide your head in the 4th and 2nd subraces. What are we made out of? Ostrich blood?

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Permalink Reply by Brenda Tucker on May 20, 2009 at 6:02pm

And there are people, who knowing full well what girasas is, they're going to head for it. . . . . .

A rare breed!!

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Permalink Reply by Brenda Tucker on May 23, 2009 at 5:49pm

When I first started talking to others about this (people who weren't theosophists), I was very interested in the reactions because I honestly didn't know what would happen. (I still don't.) I remember it was about 7 years after I had begun the process of joining discussions and bearing my soul to them that I finally hit this "mark" where I really thought I had seen ALL the different types of reactions there were and there was no use trying to collect reactions anymore. At that point, I was much more confident about what I would be saying, when I would be saying it, and how I would act.

You are probably where I was during those initial years, thinking that other people might a) need support, b) require healthcare (if their mental health became damaged), c) need solace or counseling, etc.

I began to include in my discussions the idea that churches could become "fallout shelters" and I still think they could aid quite a bit in the bewilderment that might result from, say, national news coverage.

I've even claimed that I go to church for my regular "treatments" so that I can be in a group that has similar experiences and that my peers can better judge whether I have a healthy outlook or an unhealthy one and help me to become more "normal."

Brenda

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Permalink Reply by Mikhayl Von Riebon on May 21, 2009 at 1:09am

beautiful observation, i was starting to wonder if it was just me.

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